late-night ramblings
Jun. 29th, 2006 11:30 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
accresceI think I understand what Becky always means when she says late nights make her spew out words and feelings into her LJ. Most of my spewing was done in friendslocked entries at ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
clarinelf, but now I think it's time for some hardcore reflection.
The next month and a half is going to be insane. Between working (hopefully) two jobs and getting stuff organized for school, I am going to have zero in the way of free time. I hope late nights are okay with mis amigos for hanging out, because otherwise I won't be seeing much of them.
Actually, I haven't been seeing much of anyone lately. And this makes me incredibly sad. I've hung out with John a few times in the past week, which has gone from being awkward to emotional to pretty normal. I'm really glad we took that walk the other day. But other than that, I guess I feel very much cut off from a lot of the people I wanted to spend all summer with. I shut myself away for a few days when That Thing happened, and spent a lot of time reflecting on how I can react to all the things that are going on around me and in my life. Ted Leo helped a lot.
Books are good for keeping me entertained, but they're not great company when I need someone to talk to or laugh with or do something stupid with like ride bikes to Target or bum around at Bagels by the Book.
I haven't picked up my clarinet in weeks. It saddens me how little I care, really. I suppose that's one mark of how much I've changed over the past three years or so.
Somehow, after all the things I've said about wanting to get out of Mundelein, I can't make myself want to move away from the life I have here.
clarinelf, but now I think it's time for some hardcore reflection.The next month and a half is going to be insane. Between working (hopefully) two jobs and getting stuff organized for school, I am going to have zero in the way of free time. I hope late nights are okay with mis amigos for hanging out, because otherwise I won't be seeing much of them.
Actually, I haven't been seeing much of anyone lately. And this makes me incredibly sad. I've hung out with John a few times in the past week, which has gone from being awkward to emotional to pretty normal. I'm really glad we took that walk the other day. But other than that, I guess I feel very much cut off from a lot of the people I wanted to spend all summer with. I shut myself away for a few days when That Thing happened, and spent a lot of time reflecting on how I can react to all the things that are going on around me and in my life. Ted Leo helped a lot.
Books are good for keeping me entertained, but they're not great company when I need someone to talk to or laugh with or do something stupid with like ride bikes to Target or bum around at Bagels by the Book.
I haven't picked up my clarinet in weeks. It saddens me how little I care, really. I suppose that's one mark of how much I've changed over the past three years or so.
Somehow, after all the things I've said about wanting to get out of Mundelein, I can't make myself want to move away from the life I have here.
